Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
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Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
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Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks