Whats the glycemic index on semen?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.