Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

from now on my penis is your penis

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(908): View more from New Jersey

It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers

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(863): View more from Florida

Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.

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(269): View more from Michigan

i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(262): View more from Wisconsin

yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.

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(530): View more from California

My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans

(530): View more from California

You've been usurped as King of the Gays

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(207): View more from Maine

Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.

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(770): View more from Georgia

Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.

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(850): View more from Florida

I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.

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