gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.