hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
