Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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