If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
