this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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