Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
She made me pour olive oil on her.
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