Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"

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(513): i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway" http://tfl.nu/kkqr

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(845): View more from New York

Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.

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(845): Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian. http://tfl.nu/smlz

Replies (24) Good night (2703) Bad night (980)
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(916): View more from California

awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment

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(916): awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment http://tfl.nu/ypy1

Replies (35) Good night (512) Bad night (3377)
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(248): View more from Michigan

He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???

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(248): He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2??? http://tfl.nu/dt4w

Replies (51) Good night (5770) Bad night (866)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night

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(307): Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night http://tfl.nu/tl6b

Replies (7) Good night (932) Bad night (3793)
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(315): View more from New York

It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities

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(315): It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities http://tfl.nu/tqmj

Replies (11) Good night (5118) Bad night (1493)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.

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(608): I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh. http://tfl.nu/0i8s

Replies (17) Good night (523) Bad night (1708)
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(320): View more from Minnesota

Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.

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(320): Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house. http://tfl.nu/jt6d

Replies (10) Good night (1510) Bad night (532)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.

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(250): Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life. http://tfl.nu/nnhi

Replies (8) Good night (943) Bad night (527)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?

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(412): I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask? http://tfl.nu/ymvc

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(206): View more from Washington

I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.

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(206): I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems. http://tfl.nu/rm1a

Replies (2) Good night (256) Bad night (393)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.

(501): View more from Arkansas

Just skip

(479): View more from Arkansas

Please. i have SOME standards

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(479): Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day. (501): Just skip (479): Please. i have SOME standards http://tfl.nu/0muv

Replies (0) Good night (844) Bad night (290)
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(614): View more from Ohio

i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised

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(614): i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised http://tfl.nu/gtie

Replies (1) Good night (195) Bad night (414)
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(727): View more from Florida

So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.

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(727): So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink. http://tfl.nu/ln3w

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(410): View more from Maryland

I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.

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(410): I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling. http://tfl.nu/eba9

Replies (3) Good night (319) Bad night (770)

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