Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  where are you

  (303): View more from Colorado

  in your bedroom

  (602): View more from Arizona

  how did you get in

  (303): View more from Colorado

  your wife…

  (602): View more from Arizona

  WTF

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  (602): where are you (303): in your bedroom (602): how did you get in (303): your wife… (602): WTF http://tfl.nu/cmfn
  Replies (6) Good night (1349) Bad night (2381)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.

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  (303): dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0. http://tfl.nu/gdax
  Replies (35) Good night (6284) Bad night (1080)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying

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  (404): He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying http://tfl.nu/0ccm
  Replies (8) Good night (3448) Bad night (4216)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Get out now.

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  (301): If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me? (513): Get out now. http://tfl.nu/w3kk
  Replies (57) Good night (8414) Bad night (2794)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.

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  (802): Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there. http://tfl.nu/8qlt
  Replies (8) Good night (3227) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker

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  (617): I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker http://tfl.nu/yzaq
  Replies (25) Good night (6568) Bad night (1054)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.

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  (513): And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool. http://tfl.nu/hylh
  Replies (4) Good night (4019) Bad night (968)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.

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  (210): I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast. http://tfl.nu/qvgk
  Replies (143) Good night (2488) Bad night (50833)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.

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  (301): not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk. http://tfl.nu/3j1w
  Replies (2) Good night (896) Bad night (1783)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"

  (1-416): View more from Toronto

  You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?

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  (416): She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?" (1-416): You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right? http://tfl.nu/2p2l
  Replies (17) Good night (2828) Bad night (667)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  That does not seem like timing

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  (347): The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is? (973): That does not seem like timing http://tfl.nu/n0dp
  Replies (3) Good night (602) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  $1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place

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  (602): $1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place http://tfl.nu/ekdp
  Replies (1) Good night (617) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.

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  (580): Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA. http://tfl.nu/0dmc
  Replies (3) Good night (1089) Bad night (375)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..

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  (715): He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not.. http://tfl.nu/15ql
  Replies (26) Good night (511) Bad night (241)
• Favorite

  (478): View more from Georgia

  Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.

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  (478): Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town. http://tfl.nu/kget
  Replies (0) Good night (351) Bad night (147)

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