its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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