im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
