did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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