I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
