they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize