I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
