wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
