There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
