It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
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