Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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