if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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