You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
