i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
