Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Randomize
