i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
