addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
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