I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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