I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Randomize
