You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
