i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
