You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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