I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
