no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
