I smell stomach acid.
i just google imaged poop.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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