what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
no. you can't hotbox the world.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
