in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
