hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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