i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
