Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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