Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
how do flat chested girls get laid?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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