I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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