OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
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