Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Randomize