So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I accidentally burped into my bong.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
This is the prime rib incident all over again
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
