I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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