the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Randomize