Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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