Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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