so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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