Moan for me like Helen Keller
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
