Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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