you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
