Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
